The Covid-19 crisis has been hard for all of us: social isolation, anxiety about loved ones, disruption of routines. And in the midst of it came the news about Periappa. I knew he had been having a very difficult time health-wise over the past year especially, but his passing still affected me deeply. The days after hearing the news were filled with thoughts of him, and of all he meant to the family. When I think of Periappa, it is always as the elder statesman of the family. Everyone looked up to him, trusting in his wisdom and guidance. It was a heavy responsibility to bear, but Periappa had the strength of character to bear it. As the oldest child in a family with limited resources, and with the father often absent on work, he learned this role early, and was conscientious in his fulfilment of it, even when stricken by illness. Whenever I was in Chennai, I would drop in on Periamma and him, and seek their blessings. The blessings were for the future – what I realise more and more with time is how instrumental Periappa has been in the security our family has achieved. We live in an individualistic age, and there is a tendency to think that we are in control of our destinies. In the year of Covid, though, it has become clearer than ever how dependent we are on our social networks, and especially on family. We are who we are because of family, not just in terms of material circumstances, but also in terms of the mindset and values with which we navigate the world. Periappa was the living embodiment of these values.

Periappa also had extraordinary personal qualities – warmth, curiosity, affection. When I visualize him, it is always with that dazzling smile of his. He exuded an air of authority, and yet there was a gentleness to him. When he asked about me and how I was doing, I always felt that it came out of genuine interest, and he was so generous in his praise of achievements. He had many interests: politics, cricket, music, among others. He and Periamma used to enjoy going to Carnatic music concerts, and it felt particularly cruel that he couldn’t enjoy his retirement more. It was tough to see him suffer with Parkinson’s for such an extended period, but he bore the illness so bravely. There were times when the advances in medical procedures seemed to reverse the course of the illness, and it was uplifting to see him restored at those times to something like his previous self. I am glad that he is at peace now, and I hope he was aware just how much he meant to our family.

Rahul Santhanam
25 May 2021